You Suck At Love
by Shinsun
Summary: ChiChi has been cheating on Goku for months, but she doesn't realize that he's known all along what she does on her nights alone. Finally, enough is enough and Goku puts his foot down. A songfic for You Suck At Love by Simple Plan. Now im being forced to remove the lyrics from the story cuz of copyright stuff, so youll have to find them on your own, sorry...


You Suck At Love

DBZ songfic one-shot by Shinsun

_((The song belongs to Simple Plan, unfortunately, i had to remove the lyrics from the songfic because of copyright issues, so all i have left is the story.))_

X

Goku could smell it on her; the heady, pungent scent of sweat and sex. He knew ChiChi had been cheating on him for some time now; he'd tried to turn a blind eye up until now, but this was the third time this week. What did he do wrong? What would possess ChiChi to seek out another man? And so frequently? _I give her everything I have, is that not enough?_

It hadn't always been this way. Oh, no, ChiChi and Goku used to get along famously. Of course there was the whole frying pan issue and Goku's disappearances and deaths, but he'd though they'd managed to overlook such small rifts in what he saw as a perfectly good marriage.

Goku sighed, leaning back in his chair and running a hand through his forever-unkempt black spikes. He didn't want to lose his marriage with ChiChi; he loved her and he assumed she loved him. He knew she wanted their sons to grow up with parents who had a healthy relationship.

_But marriage has rules,_ Goku reminded himself, _and cheating simply isn't allowed. _

"Hey honey," ChiChi greeted him pleasantly, adjusting the ridiculously tight bun in her hair as she strode through the door, carrying groceries and smiling, "How's your day?"

_Like she did nothing wrong, _Goku mused, _Does she really think I'm that stupid?_

"Fantastic," Goku said glumly, rubbing his knuckles into his eyelids, frustrated. It wasn't even the cheating that drove him so insane. It was that she _lied_ about it. That she treated Goku the worse for it; like she had men to spare and it didn't matter if she lost the one she had. She probably did.

"A three-syllable word," ChiChi remarked in mock-awe, "Congratulations,"

Goku bit back a retort. Something involving words with a lot more syllables than that. He hated – _hated ! – _how ChiChi treated him like a universal idiot. He wasn't totally brainless.

"ChiChi," Goku began, _One last chance; one more test, if she fails this one, it's over._

"Hmm?" ChiChi mumbled, busting around with putting things in the cupboards.

Goku took a deep breath and plunged on, "Did you do anything…. _worth noting_ today?"

ChiChi held up a jar of spaghetti sauce as an answer, "I went shopping,"

"I mean besides that," Goku grit out impatiently.

ChiChi hesitated.

…_Cards are on the table…. She probably knows I know, but will she admit it? Admit she's wrong?_ Goku held his breath.

"No, I can't think of anything," the woman said evasively.

_Well, that answers that._

Goku stood up, tail flicking uneasily. This was the hard part.

"That's the last one, ChiChi," he said coolly.

"The last what?" his wife asked nonchalantly.

"The last lie I'm gonna take from you,"

ChiChi said nothing, just stared, for a good five seconds. Then she blinked, pasted on a totally fabricated smile and laughed.

"Oh Goku, you're hilarious," she said without humor.

Goku narrowed his eyes, the fur on his dark tail fluffing out; betraying irritation. She was just trying to run him in circles. Not this time, thank you. He'd given her one too many chances.

"I know all about you're little _escapades_, ChiChi," he went on, keeping his voice level, friendly, but the intent in coal eyes probably took away from his casual mask.

ChiChi giggled that totally flat laugh again, "Seriously Goku, where are you getting these big words? Is Gohan finally getting to you?"

Goku remembered something his eldest son had said a while back when ChiChi was making him study ruthlessly for a college exam.

"_She knows how to be a mother; she knows how to be a wife. She could tell you why bleach ruins colored clothes and why not to use a wooden cutting board to chop meat; but she couldn't tell you what love is. She just doesn't know how to say it. It's just words to her."_

"Maybe he is," Goku said distantly, "But ChiChi, that's beside the point."

"Pasta tonight?" ChiChi went on, as if he hadn't spoken, proffering a box of noodles.

Goku's tail stilled. He'd had enough.

Faster than the eye could see, he grabbed her wrist, knocking the pasta to the floor and forcing her gaze to meet his. She looked like she could have screamed, but her voice left her.

"ChiChi, look at me," he growled, "I know you're cheating on me. I have for months."

ChiChi paled, her lower lip trembling, Goku guessed she'd almost forgotten her husband was Saiyan.

"But I –" she stammered, "I never said… I never…."

_She still thinks I'm stupid,_ Goku thought mutinously, _She thinks she's been playing me; that she's oh-so-clever and I didn't have a clue._

"Y-you _knew_?" the woman squeaked.

Goku couldn't help smirking. Oh, she'd thought she was deceiving him; but he'd known since day one.

"Shouldn't've married a Saiyan," he tapped the side of his nose, "I could smell it on you the whole time,"

ChiChi pulled out of his grip, looking murderous.

"Why didn't you say anything?" she hissed, "I thought – "

"I wanted you to realize what you were doing was wrong, to admit a mistake like an honorable wife."

_It's hopeless,_ Goku thought sadly, _I'm going to lose her._

He straightened. _No, she'd going to lose me. I haven't lost anything; she's the one worse off._ And that bolstered his confidence.

ChiChi blinked, "Who are you?" she snarled.

Goku curled his tail around his waist instinctively, a Saiyan gesture of defense.

"I'm your husband. The one that _doesn't cheat on you,_"

Chichi scowled, "You're not my husband; Goku would never speak to me this way,"

Goku almost felt bad for her. Delusional, desperate; what _wouldn't_ she do to get her way?

"'Bout time he did," he said at last.

Neither said anything for a few minutes. ChiChi looked like she was sulking, arms crossed, nose in the air. Goku waited patiently. He wasn't letting her off this easy. She had to admit she was wrong, despite her pride. He'd stand here all day if he had to; he had nothing to lose.

"Goku, I…" ChiChi said eventually.

Goku stared, was she going to apologize?

"I know what I did was against our vows…"

_Oh, here we go,_ Goku sighed, she was going to try and drag _him_ into it? This he had to see.

"But you haven't exactly been _there_ for me when I needed you,"

Goku fought the urge to roll his eyes. _Why do I even bother?_

"ChiChi. Just get out." He said flatly.

"Wh -?" ChiChi sputtered.

"Get. Out. I don't want to hear excuses. It's over."

A sudden look of fear crossed ChiChi's face and Goku knew his eyes had flashed teal for a moment as he fought down his mounting exasperation and frustration.

"Alright." She said coldly, drawing herself up. A rather pitiful display compared to tangible Saiyan anger, "Fine. I've had enough of you Saiyan freaks anyway,"

And she left without another word. Goku watched her go; not sorry at all.

_-Shinsun  
_


End file.
